How has rejection changed your attitude toward the people who have hurt you?
Then let's list the ways that we have rejected others.
Manipulation and a desire to control others are key instruments of a person who feels rejected. Many times when a person rejects us, they want us to perform a certain way. By using rejection, they manipulate us until our actions line up with their desires.
The only way to combat rejection is to gain a strong understanding of our position in Yahoshua The Messiah. Our worth and personhood are not determined by those around us. Anytime we base our self-worth on what other people say about us, we set ourselves up for possible rejection. Let's learn what YAH says about us and our position in His family.
In 1st Kaypha (Peter), Kaypha writes to a group of believers struggling with persecution and deep rejection. Trying to instill a sense of hope in those who will read his letter, Kaypha tells them of their value in the Kingdom of YAH:
Based on 1st Kaypha/Peter, let's write down our value in The Messiah.
Now let's list all the descriptive words that Kaypha uses to describe our personhood as a member of YAH's family.
The following list is characteristics of a person struggling with feelings of rejection. Rejection is a result of basic human needs not being met. For example, each of us has the basic need to be accepted. As you read through the following list, ask YAH to show you any traits that may dominate your life.
Fear of opinions of others
Perfectionism
Projecting a false sense of superiority
Suspicious of anything nice done for you
Difficulty in trusting YAH
Difficulty in trusting others
Severe depression and thoughts of suicide
Self verification — seeking proof of self-worth
Over-emphasis on material values
Over-emphasis on dress and appearance
Over-emphasis on the sensual
Domineering appearance
Critical spirit
Self-imposed isolation
Feelings of inferiority
Projection of superiority
Anger
Causes for rejection are many. A thoughtless, seemingly harmless word spoken by a parent can be perceived by a child in such a way that he or she experiences a lifetime of rejection. Obvious forms of rejection include mental, physical, and sexual.
Divorce is a leading cause of rejection. Many divorced people find it difficult to begin life over after divorce. They struggle with feelings of failure and low self-esteem. A death or abandonment of a parent also leads to feelings of rejection. Guilt of past sins and the criticism of others are avenues of rejection.
Write down any major event that has caused you to experience rejection.
We are the only ones who can stop the horrendous effects of rejection. While YAH provides the spiritual tools, we must choose to use them. Anytime rejection gains a foothold in our lives, our self-esteem suffers. We find it hard to forgive ourselves and others. Instead, we hold grudges because someone issued a thoughtless remark.
Feelings of resentfulness and bitterness from a lack of forgiveness only feed a poor self-image. We must ask YAH to show us the people we need to forgive. They may have hurt us deeply; but by forgiving them after we have let them know the wrong they have done to us, and allowing them to acknowledge that wrong, apologize and ask for forgivness, we are freeing ourself to receive YAH's forgiveness and restoration in our own life. The following prayer will help us extend forgiveness as we bring that person's name to YAH in prayer.
Let's pray:
Abba YAH, it is not easy to forgive _____________ . You know the pain I have suffered because of _____________ , and his/her actions toward me. Todah that I am not facing this situation alone and that by Your love and mercy I am able to forgive _____________ . And I pray that those whom I have caused pain by rejecting, will be able to forgive me as well. I realize that You are freeing me to experience the wonder of Your mercy and complete forgiveness in my own life. I choose to forgive _________________, and release him/her to You.
Todah for loving me. YAHWAH, I love You and pray that You will guard my life and heart from any spirit of bitterness or resentment.
I ask this in the Redeeming Name of Yahoshua Ha Mashyakh.
HaleluYah! Todah Yah! Ahmayn!
Dealing successfully with rejection requires honesty and a willingness to get to the root of the problem which is a poor view of our self-worth. We can never base our worth as a person on the opinion of others. If we do, we are sure to suffer disappointment and rejection.
Only YAH can meet all our needs. He is our sufficiency in every situation. We belong to YAH through our relationship with Yahoshua. We hold a valued place in YAH that no one else can occupy.
Yahoshua knew that after His death there would be long, dark moments of confusion and persecution for his talmeedeem/disciples. Therefore, he prepared a way for them to sense his presence forever. They never had to lose their sense of belonging because YAH sent another comforter to them, Ruakh Ha Qadosh/The Holy Spirit, (YAHWAH Himself).
YAH has personally chosen us. Our names are etched in the palms of His hands. He promises to be our Strength, our Sufficiency, and our Redeemer.
We are capable to work, live, and enjoy life because of the power that is ours in Yahoshua. The next time rejection comes—
Identify the source of the rejection and the accompanying feelings.
Reaffirm your position in YAH and Yahoshua. Tell YAH exactly what you are feeling. Know that He understands the heartache of rejection and will use every trial to draw you closer to Himself.
Recall the unchanging truth that you are loved, totally accepted, and complete in Yahoshua.
Yahoshua suffered the ultimate form of rejection. He was jeered, spat on, lied on, threatened, and finally murdered! His entire life was a sacrificial offering of forgiveness, acceptance, and love. Yet everywhere he went, he faced rejection. But man's view of him never altered his focus (as it should not with ours). It could never damage what he knew to be true: He was eternally one with YAHWAH, and he knew he was eternally loved. Victory over the world's rejection was his. He did not need the world's approval because he already had the Father's, (can I get an Ahmayn)!!!
We, too, are one with YAH. The victory is ours the minute we apply the truths of YAH's Word to our lives. We don't need the approval of the world or its favor. All we will ever need has been provided for us through Yahoshua Ha Mashyakh. We can rest in his sufficiency and be content in knowing that his mercy is forever ours.
YAH may not approve of all our behavior. As we grow in Him, He will change and sand away the rough areas of our lives. When you come to Him, you never come alone. Yahoshua Ha Mashyakh is our advocate (Eebreem/Hebrews 7:25), and we always can be confident of his love and acceptance.
As this topic comes to an end sisters, let us pray once again to YAHWAH, let us cry out unto Him with all of our hearts, our souls, and our might!!! How badly do you want deliverence from the pain of rejection? Then let's make sure He truly hear our prayers, and feel the sincerity of our hearts!
As we come to the end this topic on "Rejection", I would like to bring to mind another way we could find ourselves being the perpetrators of rejection.
When I was young, I remember my emah (mother), would listen to a gospel station on the radio and there was this particular song that would come on by a female gospel singer. The song was about a woman who had two bahneem (sons). When they were young the mother did everything she could to care for her sons. One of the sons always got himself in "trouble", and the other son was the "perfect" son. When they grew up, one of the sons became a "doctor", the other one became a "no good bum." By this time their emah had grown quite old, and was slow in quite a few ways. So the son that was the doctor, asked his emah to come and live with him and his family. So she did, but the wife of the prominent son was rather arrogant (stuck up). She told her husband that she felt his mother was a bad impression for their yeledeem (children). That the emah didn't speak "good" english, and that she just wasn't the type she wanted to have around when their friends came over for dinner parties, etc.
The eeshah (wife), suggested that they put the emah into an nursing home! The son agreed. They were just about to do so, but then all of sudden out of nowhere (yeah right ), the emah saw her other son driving in the opposite direction. He told his emah, that he does not live in a big mansion like his brother, does not wear the "fancy clothes", drive the "fancy cars", or even speak the "fancy language." He eats beans out of the can, and don't have much to offer, but..., but...she can come home to live with him. She does not have to go to a nursing home. He'll take care of her himself.
I must tell you sisters, when I heard that song it made tears come to my eyes! The singer of the song was none other than the great Shirley Caesar (my favorite gospel singer)!!!
Just take a listen to the song, it's called: "Don't Drive Your Mama Away."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KXSDe4lBvk
Sisters, putting our family members off on others is a form of rejection. We can reject our elders, by putting them into nursing homes, letting others care for them instead of us. Back in the day, that was unheard of!!! We took care of our elders, had them to live with us, either in an extra bedroom, in a finished attic or finished basement (both made comfortable and suitable for living), etc. We took the time to see to their needs, because they were family. Just because they had grown old, did not and does not mean that they are to be disposed of like "soiled disposable diapers." They raised us, took care of our trifling behinds, and now that we are "grown", we think that we're too "ed-u-ma-cated" to care for them! If indeed we are like this sisters, WOE UNTO US!!! Remember the day is coming that we too, (if we're blessed), will be at a ripe old age, and will our children care for us or drop us off at the nearest nursing home!
If we do have elders in our midst, we need to care for them. Don't "put them off" on others, especially those that don't know them, and sees taking care of them only as "doing a job!" Do we really know what goes on in nursing homes? Have you seen secretly taped videos on the news about what supposedly "caretakers" do to our elders? IT IS A SHAME!!! And we will be held responsible by YAHWAH!
Just wanted to bring this thought of "Rejection" to the forefront of our minds also.
As we end this topic, this definitely calls for a prayer...
YAHWAH, Ha El Rahkhameem (YAHWAH, The Elohym of Mercies),
Abba YAH, todah rabah that You personally understand my feelings of rejection. Help me to learn to accept myself as well as those around me. Forgive me for the times when I have "rejected You" and when I have lashed out at others because I have felt unloved and unworthy. I claim my position before You today that I am a joint heir with Yahoshua Ha Mashyakh. I lay aside any form of self-righteousness within me and, instead, claim the righteousness of Yahoshua Ha Mashyakh as my strength. Todah for having promised to live each day in me and through me. Therefore, I can rest in the security of Your care and promise of Your eternal provision.
I ask this in the Powerful Name of Yahoshua, Who is The Lamb of Elohym.
HaleluYAH! Todah YAH! Ahmayn!
Receive The Wisdom....
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